A Little Something For The Road…

The Coach is a pretty funny guy. Early in our relationship, we had the following conversation about funerals…

The Coach: I’ve been thinking about the type of funeral service I want to have when the time comes.

Me: What do you mean? Why are you telling me this? Is there something I should know?

The Coach: First of all I’m not dying and I’m telling you because you will plan it. I want my funeral to reflect me.

Me: Okay, but don’t most funerals reflect the deceased?

The Coach: Well, I haven’t been to many funerals but, the one that sticks out to me involved a terrible singer. The good thing about this guy was that his singing was so bad, he made us laugh. So, I decided that I wanted to do something a little different for mine. Let’s be honest, I’m a fun guy so why not put the ‘fun’ back in funeral. Most importantly, I want us to put together a cd of songs for our guests to experience. You know something they can play whenever they are thinking about me.

Me (laughing pretty hard): Wait, time out. The ‘fun in funeral’? And you want funeral favors to be handed out?? Since when are you an ‘experience’ guy? This is beyond crazy. Are you kidding me?

The Coach: I am serious! I would like people to have a little something to take home to remember me on the ride home or whenever. I was thinking a 2 disc cd set.

Me (still laughing): Where will this epic funeral take place? You know some of your favorite songs are not appropriate for a church.

The Coach: At church of course but, the cd wouldn’t be played during the service, it would be debuted at the wake/visitation. It will be a gift for coming to the funeral.

Now, I am laughing so hard tears are streaming down my face. A funeral cd? I am unable to speak. Finally, when I am able to collect myself, we continue the conversation.

Me: So, to be clear you want those attending your funeral to get some sort of party favor at the end? And you want that to be a cd?

The Coach: Exactly! And I want the liner of the cd to be a copy of the obituary.

I guess I need to look into something like this...
I guess I need to look into something like this…

Me:  This keeps getting better. I’m not doing that, you are outrageous.

The Coach: But isn’t the funeral suppose to be about me? I’m telling you this is what I want, isn’t it a great idea?

Me: Maybe we could do A cd, 2 is a bit much.

The Coach: You know I love for people to have a good time especially if we are hosting something, shouldn’t my funeral be the same?

Me:  I agree, funerals are a celebration of life. But you my friend, can go a little overboard. We will have to work on the details a little on this one.  Can we table this conversation for say 100 years? 😉

The Coach: Yes, but you have to do it for me!

So, naturally I did a little research on the subject and as I should have known, memorial or funeral favors exist. Just not to the extent of what The Coach would like to do.

Seriously, what have I gotten myself into here? 🙂

Photo Credits

Where’s My Check?

The Coach was an amazing athlete in high school and college (according to him he STILL is, he’s cute). 🙂 While he was in college, he was blessed to grace the cover of Sports Illustrated.  Obviously, this was an AMAZING accomplishment and a framed copy of the cover hangs in our daughter’s bedroom. Recently, he went to pick up my Mother-in-Law, GG, from her house, a few hours away, to bring her up to our house for a visit.

Since GG is downsizing and moving back to her hometown, each time we go to her house she sends us home with some of the Coach’s things. Often times, pictures and childhood keepsakes of him and his beloved brother as kids.  This time, once GG was settled and the Coach had unloaded the truck, he walked into the kitchen and handed me this oddly familiar looking photo/picture/poster.

The Coach: Do you recognize that photo?

Me: It’s you but, it is weird.

The Coach: How do you know it’s me?

20131105_231300-1Me: Because I look at that image every day.  It looks like some generic version of the SI cover. Did you make that?

The Coach (laughing): It is me and no, I didn’t make it.

Me: Well, who did?

The Coach: Some sports marketing company.  Every once in a while this picture would pop up in grocery stores, gas stations, etc for football themed promotions or giveaways.  Once one of my friends saw it and told me about it.  After that, I would see them from time to time.  I got one and kept it.

Me: What?  Can they do that without your permission? Are they still using it? Where’s your check??

The Coach: There is no check.  I was in college when the original photo was taken so SI would be getting a check if anyone.

Me:  That is crazy! So, they have this picture of you popping up all around the Southeast and there is nothing you can do? I am going to track down this company and see what’s going on.

The Coach: You are funny.

Me: I’m serious!  I mean, you should at least be able to make sure the weird poster shows up at grocery store and gas station chains we like!  I’m just saying.

I did a little digging and that company doesn’t currently produce the weird poster anymore.  But I guess I can understand how it can happen…

Once while working as a Consultant in 2001, a woman in my group would often tell me that she had seen me somewhere before.  After a few months of us trying to figure it out, I thought I probably reminded her of someone else she knew. Until one day, she asked me to come into her office.

Work Lady: You know that my family and I are headed to Disney for our vacation this year.

Me: Great place.  I was there a few years ago for a conference, I had a great time.

Work Lady (smiling): I know!

Me: Huh?  How would you know about my conference in Orlando? Did we meet there??

Work Lady: Not exactly. You probably don’t know this but, Disney sends out promotional videos when you ask for more information about the parks and attractions.  Have you seen one before? I brought in the one they sent us.

Me: No, I haven’t seen one before.

Work Lady pops the video into the machine she has in her office and hits play.  We watched the intro of attractive families describe their dreamy Disney vacation filled with beloved characters, theme park attractions, and lifelong memories of ‘the best vacation ever’. I almost booked a trip for myself right then and there!  After a minute or two of these vacation testimonials, Work Lady fast forwards the video and pauses it…on the screen a still of me.

And then it all started to come back to me. While attending a conference at Disney, my co-worker and I were asked to do an interview describing our experience in Downtown Disney one night.  We did the interview, signed a release, and continued to have a good time, never giving it a second thought until now.

Work Lady pressed play and there I was on the screen raving about what a great time you can have as an adult at Disney.  The entire time, I watched (and laughed at) the video I thought:

  • Did I really think that outfit was cute?
  • How many other people have seen this?
  • I definitely had a couple of drinks that night!

Clearly, the Coach and I should have some endorsement deals.  I mean seriously, just think of all the grocery store and gas station football related items that reversible (that’s right it has two sides!) poster influenced folks to buy. And let’s not forget all the families that decided to choose another destination for their family vacation after watching the Disney video.

All I can say is…America, you’re welcome. 🙂

Do It Now!

Sometimes the encouragement you need comes from an unexpected source. 🙂

Thanks to the amazing staff at Lululemon  (slightly obsessed with the brand by the way) in Jacksonville, FL for their hospitality.  Here’s hoping I am able to post actual content earlier than 11:59p tomorrow. National Blog Posting Month aka NaBloPoMo is proving to be a little more challenging than I hoped, but tomorrow is another day!

A little encouragement from my baby courtesy of Lululemon-Jacksonville, FL.
A little encouragement from my baby courtesy of Lululemon-Jacksonville, FL.

Talk Baby To Me

If you are a parent, I guarantee this has happened to you (or is happening to you now it just depends on the age of your child). Shortly after Georgia Peach was born, the Coach and I started to notice how some people would speak to us THROUGH our baby in an effort to tell us what they thought about our parenting.

Went a little something like this…

Passive Aggressive Person (talking to your baby): “You don’t need this pacifier you are almost 12 weeks old! Let me have it” (as they try to remove your boob saver aka pacifier from your infant’s mouth).

Listen Lady, Georgia Peach is a very enthusiastic breastfeeder if you would like to take a go at it being her food source every couple of hours, please be my guest. I could so use a nap.

The worst part about this form of ‘Baby Talk’ is that it turned out to be contagious…I caught myself doing the same thing to our Nanny!  Boo. 😉

Ever happen to you?

Marriage Advice From Your Single Friend?

This might be a bit of a rant so, I will try to keep it together…as much as possible. 🙂 I understand that some of you will not agree with this post, which is cool.  😉

Not too long ago, I was scrolling through my twitter feed and came across a tweet with a link to an article which I found rather ridiculous, entitled, “Why Single People Should Give Married People Relationship  Advice”.  Ummmm, say what?

I have always subscribed to the philosophy that single (and never been married) people should not give married people advice.  Period.  So, when I saw this link I decided to read it and check out the Author’s perspective.  Maybe I am missing something? In the article, the Author shares four reasons, why she is equipped to pass out her pearls of wisdom to her married girlfriends.  The Author is a single, never been married woman and feels her relationship experience has given her the knowledge to provide guidance, when asked. She understands that often times her friends reach out to her to just vent but, really?

Stating, “No, I have never been married, but I have been someone’s significant other and know the difference between right and wrong”.

That’s sweet.

I have only been married a short time and I can honestly say my marriage is completely different from any previous long-term relationship.  Granted, I married a pretty awesome guy who I like, love, and adore. But first and foremost we trust and believe in God which is immensely helpful just in our day-to-day interactions. Yet some of the issues/decisions we face, I could have never imagined nor did I encounter as a single woman in a long-term relationship.  So, I find it difficult to seek advice from someone who hasn’t experienced something similar within the confines of marriage.

I do not believe that just because someone is married they are equipped to offer advice to other married people. I’m not! 🙂  I think you should consider the source in all matters. There are some people who shouldn’t be or just don’t want to be married so soliciting advice from them about marriage should come with a yellow flag attached to it. 🙂 That’s not to say they don’t have something valuable to share.  It is likely they do.

If you needed a life saving surgery, who would you rather have performing your surgery? An expert in that procedure or someone who has watched the surgery performed but knows right from wrong?

What do you think?

Please Stop Talking, Please?

Dealing with the death of a loved one is an extremely personal experience, everyone has a unique journey through it. As you encounter every emotion under the sun, people say the stupidest things to you most, in an effort to comfort you or fill the silence with idiotic notions. Here are a couple of my favorites…

“It’s been a few months now since your Mom passed, are things getting back to normal?”

Umm Cray Cray, as old as you are you should know better than to say this to anyone a couple of months after losing their Mother.  My response, “Huh? I don’t know what normal is anymore.”

“…well, you didn’t need her anymore.”

Honestly, if I hadn’t been in church when this comment was made to me, I would have punched this idiot in the mouth. Seriously? This one STILL fires me up! You always need your Mother, obviously not in the same way you did earlier in your life but, you still need her. I have no words for you…that are nice. 😉

Please stop talking, please!

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So, here is my advice (yes, this post comes with unsolicited advice…you’re welcome!) when you are at a loss of words, try one of these two phrases.

 “How are you doing?”

or

“I’m sorry for your loss.”

Actually, some of the best sources of comfort for me came without a word being said, a hug, a gentle squeeze of my hand in passing, or someone just being present, there.

Of course, you should do what is best for you. But when all else fails and you aren’t sure what to do or say, a Hallmark card will work nicely too. 🙂

photo credits